The (Goose) Minefield!

My place of employment has a problem - a goose problem! If you were to drive into the parking lot today there is honestly no possible way to avoid the myriad of goose poo scattered everywhere! I know, I know..."Jason, haven't the geese already started flying south for the winter?" That is what I thought too...maybe they are all stopping here along their way to do their dirty work!

Through extensive Google research (i.e. a 2 min search and click) I have discovered that there are several ways to get rid of geese. So here are a few strategies I apparently need to implement here at work:

1 - Don't feed them: I currently don't see anyone out there feeding the geese during lunch. Therefore, the only logical solution is to rip up all the grass and replace it with lawn flamingos.

2 - Deploy decoys: See point #1 - since most large birds defend their young they can be viscous to other waterfowl. Instead of implementing the recommended trumpeter swan decoy, I would rather see pink lawn flamingos used - colorful and tacky!

3 - Scare strategies: Some suggestions for scare strategies include scary eyes, reflective shiny tape, floating objects and loud noises. Great suggestions, huh?! Here is what I would do - print off the picture to the right and tape in on large posts with reflective shiny tape! Fool proof solution!

4 - Goose dog: Most people seem to suggest Border Collies for this task. I love dogs so this seems like a great fit. Anyone know a Border Collie breeder that has between 25 - 30 grown dogs available for lease?

5 - Stake and string: By far my favorite solution to the goose problem comes from working_man66 on Yahoo Answers. This genius of a man suggests the following - "Put a stake in the ground at each end of your property then tie fishing line from one to the other. The geese won't step over the line that hangs 3-4 inches off the ground!" I could see a couple of issue with this - coworkers may trip over the line and last I checked geese can fly!

In all seriousness though these geese are REALLY annoying! I honestly have to look where I am walking each morning when I come into the office! Anyone else have geese issues at work?