I Love the Office

It is sad, really. :( You probably already heard, but this season will be Steve Carrell's last on The Office. Because I am in the mood...today's post will be some hilarious quotes from The Office - mainly from Dwight...he is so funny! Enjoy!

1 - Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject. So you know you are getting the best possible information. - Michael

2 - I keep various weaponry strategically placed around the office. I saved Jim’s life with a can of pepper spray I had velcro’d under my desk. People say, “oh, it’s dangerous to keep weapons in the home or the workplace”. Well I say, “it’s better to be hurt by someone you know accidentally than by a stranger on purpose.” - Dwight

3 -  Love this one!!! 

Jim: [dressed like Dwight] Question: What kind of bear is best?

Dwight: That’s a ridiculous question…

Jim: False. Black bear.

Dwight: That’s debatable, there are basically two schools of thought…

Jim: Fact: Bears eat beets. Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica.

Dwight: Bears do not…what is going on?!? What are you doing?!? 

4 - In the wild, there is no health care. In the wild, health care is, 'Ow, I hurt my leg. I can't run. A lion eats me. I'm dead.' Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion. You're dead. - Dwight

5 - Long one...
Dwight: Jim, Jim, Jim. Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.
Jim: Oh, hey, Dwight.
Dwight: I’m going to be your new boss. It’s my greatest dream come true. Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check-in time is now. Check-out time is never.
Jim: Does my room have cable?
Dwight: No. And the sheets are made of fire!
Jim: Can I change rooms?
Dwight: Sorry, we’re all booked up. Hell convention in town.
Jim: Can I have a late check-out?
Dwight: I’ll have to talk to the manager.
Jim: You’re not the manager? Even in your own fantasy?
Dwight: I’m the owner. The co-owner. With Satan.
Jim: Okay, just so I understand it. In your wildest fantasy, you are in hell. And you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil.
Dwight: Yeah, but I haven’t told you my salary yet.
Jim: Go.
Dwight: $80,000 a year.

Conan is Back!

For the past seven months, Conan O'Brien fans (Team Coco) have been waiting in anticipation for Monday's premiere of Conan's new show on TBS - Conan. Over the past month or two there has been an all out media blitz to advertise for Conan's new show...so unless you have been living under a rock you more than likely have seen one of Conan's hilarious commercial's! But was all the advertising and all the hype worth it? Will Conan's move to TBS and his battle with NBC pay out?

According to the TV ratings people Conan drew in 4.15 million viewers for his premiere Monday night. In comparison, The Tonight Show with Jay Leno regularly averages 3.5 million viewers and The Late Show with David Letterman follows with 3.4 million - and these are normal nights, not premiere nights.I highly doubt these numbers will continue for Conan, especially since his show is on basic cable and not a major network like NBC.

Numbers aside one question remains - was Conan funny? In my opinion, yes. Granted there were moments of slight boredom and I really question his choice for his first guest...no not the nutcracker lady, but in general the show felt more like the old Conan - he seemed more relaxed and the jokes seems less restricted.

The best part of the show was definitely the opening video and monologue. The pre-taped video of Conan getting fired from NBC and the "path" he took to get to TBS was hilarious! The best part of the video was when the NBC goons opened fire on him - good times. The interview segments were solid and funny, though I still question his choice for the first guest. His first interviewed guest was Seth Rogen and I thought this was a horrible choice! Don't get me wrong, Seth has some funn...well...he has some movies and I guess he is famous, but I think the show could have done better. With all the hype for the show I think they should have brought a bigger star for opening night - I mean Tom Hanks is on night #2 - he would have been better for opening night!

Other than Seth Rogen I thought the show was great! I hope everyone keeps watching and I hope the show stays true to Conan's humor! If you watched Monday night what did you think?

Go Conan!
Team Coco

Weekend in Rewind: 11/5 - 11/7

When a bear sh^*s in the woods...that pretty much sums up the entire weekend! Thanks for reading!

OK so that definitely does NOT sum up the entire weekend, but thanks to my brother, it was definitely the running joke all weekend! Apparently it is a real joke - similar to the "If a tree falls in the woods..." joke. This past weekend was great - it was relaxing, hilarious and it was great to spend time with the family!

Just thought it was hilarious!

Friday - Dinner on Friday was amazing, but then again it is hard to not have an amazing dinner when at Broadway Pizza! Not only is their pizza great, but the dessert is to die for --- large deep-dish chocolate chip cookie with ice cream, whipped topping and chocolate drizzle...makes me hungry just thinking about it! After dinner with The Mrs. I headed up to L.Pizzle for the weekend to do some deer hunting (man grunt). I was actually dreading the ride up to L.P. since traffic on Friday evenings is usually horrendous, but to my surprise it only took me the standard 1.5 hours! Woot! woot.com  <--- check it out! Everyone was at home this weekend - my sista's (holla), brother and his wife, Dad and AJ - it was a packed house! Friday night was spent playing cards (golf) until about 11:30 or so and surprise, surprise my sister won...and she was keeping score. Funny how that works, huh? Oh so my opening quote...During cards my brother randomly said "When a bear sh^*s in the woods..." without provocation and all of us just looked at each other not knowing what to say in response...so we all just laughed and started saying it throughout the weekend at random times. Honestly though...what do you say to something like that?

Saturday - It was an early morning on Saturday - apparently deer don't sleep in on the weekends...pfff! We all woke up around 6:00 or so to be sure we were all out in our deer stands by 6:30. I can honestly say this was the most boring deer hunt for me yet - not only was I cold, but I literally heard nothing and saw nothing all weekend...and no, blowing leaves do not count! Heck, I would have taken seeing squirrels like my sister did in her deer stand! Speaking of which, apparently she saw quite a few squirrels and one even hissed at her while she was out there!

Once everyone got back in the morning from sitting in the cold we had brunch and played some Settlers of Catan and a little Mario Brothers on the Wii until we went back out that evening. Playing the Wii was intense - my sister-in-law pretty much pwned us in the game - she is one aggressive Mario player; you honestly don't want to cross her in-game...she will kick you off the cliff - no lie. Again I saw and heard nothing when I went back out to the deer stand on Saturday night, but I was able to get a few games of Sudoku in before it got too cold :P

Sunday - Sunday morning I didn't go out to the stand on account of me being annoyed with the deer...I opted to sleep in instead. We went to Mom's for lunch and watched a little bit of the Vikings game - SKOL Vikings! I also tried my hand at putting up Mom's outside Christmas lights. I am sure it would have been a show watching me up on the roof, but if I do say so myself the lights turned out pretty good! It was worth the effort too...I got some sweet pickles for my efforts - score!

This weekend was great! It was relaxing, hilarious and very entertaining! I also got to see my very pregnant sister before she has her baby (she is due today) - I am guessing she has a boy! Hopefully everyone else had a great weekend!

Friday 5 - Deer Hunting

Some of you might not know this, but I do go deer hunting. I took a several year hiatus from hunting during college, but ever since graduation I have been getting back into it. I know some of you may not like deer hunting, but then again some of you probably don't like chocolate and well...that is weird!

Top 5 Reasons I Like Deer Hunting:

1 - Spending time with family: Hunting is not all about guys with guns dressed up like big orange pumpkins sitting out in the cold for hours on end --- it's all of that plus spending time with family, at least it is for our family. Deer hunting season is a great excuse for all of us to get together and spend some time together. I always enjoy coming back from sitting out in the deer stand and chatting or playing games with the family!

2 - Excuse to use a gun: It wouldn't be "hunting" without some sort of weapon - in this case it is a gun. Maybe this is some sort of macho manifestation, but there is just something about using a gun that is exhilarating! Ever since I was old enough and had proper firearm certification I have loved trap shooting with my Dad and brother. Since I don't have a gun in my apartment (for obvious reasons) and never get to trap shoot anymore, this is as close as I get to shooting anything all year!

3 - Experiencing nature: I personally think the best way to experience nature is to go to the beach - the ocean beach - sun, sand and water...what could be better! Since none of that exists in Minnesota the next best thing, in my opinion, is sitting out in a deer stand on a chilly November morning and soaking up Mother Nature. I remember growing up that I hated sitting in the deer stand in the morning! My feet would always get cold, my hands would freeze and I would always make too much noise to ever see a deer anyway! It is weird though...I grew up in the country and never really cared to "take in nature," but going home now for hunting I can't get enough!

4 - Relaxation: The nice thing about going deer hunting with Dad is that he always has everything set up for us when we get there! We don't have to worry about where we will be sitting since he already put up our deer stand for us! Not only that but the stands are actually very comfortable! There are times while listening to nature that I nearly doze off! No worries though...I have never fallen asleep in my stand!

5 - Catching up on Sudoku: That's right...on the off chance that I do get bored in the deer stand I make sure to bring my iPod with in case I want to play a game or two of Sudoku - assuming that my hands aren't cold. Last year I saw a deer while texting my wife, so I have concluded that deer are tech-savvy animals that just want to take a look at the latest gadgets!

Bad Things Come in Threes

I am not a superstitious person, but lately I have become a convert of the saying "Bad things come in threes." I know, I know...if you look hard enough in any given day you can probably find three bad things to fit this saying, but Monday of this week seriously fit the bill for me!

1 - I had an interview on Monday for an internal position. The interview was early in the day, which I really like - get it out of the way early so you don't have to think about it later! I made sure I had answers to all sorts of different interview questions, I wrote down several good questions to ask and I made sure to wear good interview clothes - a step up from normal business attire. When I got to work on Monday I was told the interview was postponed to Wednesday at 3:00! Ugh, not only did I use up my nice interview clothes for the week, but the interview was now in the afternoon!

2 - My pants ripped! No, they did not rip in a funny/awkward place like my bum as I bent over to pick up something. I came back from the restroom in the morning and as I put my hand in my right pocket I noticed that my finger snagged on something. I looked down and noticed that there was a small tear in the seam of my right pocket! The worst part about it was that these are newer pants!

3 - To top my Monday off in a good fashion I hear the news about the MN Vikings and how they are going to pieces...literally - look at Favre, his ankle is all messed up. Anyway, so my pants are ripped, I am mad about the interview being moved and now I hear that Moss is being waived to another team and somehow Childress didn't get fired! Ugh what a bad day! Favre is old, broken and bleh. Moss was a good receiver, but an idiot so he got let go and Childress has mismanaged this team into the ground yet escaped a firing!

OK, so these aren't the worst possible things that could happen to a person, but still...I am a true believer that bad things definitely do come in threes!

Be sure to check out the pole at the top of the page! :)

The Evolution of the Geek

I found this last night and I thought it was pretty funny! I give you The Evolution of the Geek!

Weekend in Rewind: 10/29 - 10/31

Oh man! This past weekend was great! I love Halloween and all of the fun stuff associated with it!

Friday - Friday night The Mrs. and I went to a birthday party for old-man Dan (:P) at Famous Dave's in Uptown. It is the once a year event where we get to hang out with Dan's work friends! We learned a lot about proper child rearing from one of Dan's co-workers, his rationale for still playing WoW as well as his philosophy on another *ehem* matter... After dinner we made our way to William's Peanut Bar just down the street for a drink or two and then we called it a night. If you haven't been to William's --- you must go! The beer selection is amazing! 

Saturday - Saturday started out rough with yet another embarrassing MN Gopher football loss, but the day ended on a high note with the Halloween party I attended! Saturday night I went to a zombie-themed Halloween party hosted by one of Dan's friends in Plymouth. The party itself was great - the house was decorated amazingly, the food was great and the people were a lot of fun! Everyone there was in a costume of some sort, but the overwhelming majority were dressed as zombies. I went as a zombie Twins fan (below). There was a zombie FBI agent, a mummy, Popeye, zombie Jack & Jill, zombie Wario and Waluigi, and a bunch more! I unfortunately had to leave the party earlier than I wanted, but you would be amazed how easily you get a headache when you can only use one eye...Oh and I was safe btw --- The Mrs. was kind enough to drive me to and from the party :)

Final makeup job - The Mrs. did a great job!

Just lookin' dead...no biggie

Sunday - Happy Halloween! Sunday was great! After lunch I watched yet another disappointment in MN football - the Vikings lost to the Patriots :( Seriously...they need something to turn around on that team......Since we get no trick or treaters at the apartment The Mrs. and I headed to her grandma's house around 5:00 to hand out Halloween candy. There were quite a few more kids this year than last and quite a few more rude kids than last year too! The candy we were handing out was full-sized candy bars, M&M bags, etc. and some of these kids were trying to take 2! We even had two little shysters come back to the house after they had already been there! How rude! Anyway...other than those few kids it was a lot of fun! We dressed up the dog in two costumes this year - a bumble bee and a chicken. The best part about dressing up the dog is that she doesn't fight it! We also brought over the pumpkins we had carved out earlier that afternoon to decorate the front steps.

Precious in her chicken costume

Precious in her bumble bee costume

My "silly" pumpkin

The Mrs.' "happy/hillbilly" pumpkin :)

I had a great Halloween weekend and I hope you did too! Did you dress up as anything this year? If so what was it? Oh and what did you do for Halloween?