It is sad, really. :( You probably already heard, but this season will be Steve Carrell's last on
The Office. Because I am in the mood...today's post will be some hilarious quotes from
The Office - mainly from Dwight...he is so funny! Enjoy!
1 - Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject. So you know you are getting the best possible information. - Michael
2 - I keep various weaponry strategically placed around the office. I saved Jim’s life with a can of pepper spray I had velcro’d under my desk. People say, “oh, it’s dangerous to keep weapons in the home or the workplace”. Well I say, “it’s better to be hurt by someone you know accidentally than by a stranger on purpose.” - Dwight
3 - Love this one!!!
Jim: [dressed like Dwight] Question: What kind of bear is best?
Dwight: That’s a ridiculous question…
Jim: False. Black bear.
Dwight: That’s debatable, there are basically two schools of thought…
Jim: Fact: Bears eat beets. Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica.
Dwight: Bears do not…what is going on?!? What are you doing?!?
4 - In the wild, there is no health care. In the wild, health care is, 'Ow, I hurt my leg. I can't run. A lion eats me. I'm dead.' Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion. You're dead. - Dwight
5 - Long one...
Dwight: Jim, Jim, Jim. Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.
Jim: Oh, hey, Dwight.
Dwight: I’m going to be your new boss. It’s my greatest dream come true. Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check-in time is now. Check-out time is never.
Jim: Does my room have cable?
Dwight: No. And the sheets are made of fire!
Jim: Can I change rooms?
Dwight: Sorry, we’re all booked up. Hell convention in town.
Jim: Can I have a late check-out?
Dwight: I’ll have to talk to the manager.
Jim: You’re not the manager? Even in your own fantasy?
Dwight: I’m the owner. The co-owner. With Satan.
Jim: Okay, just so I understand it. In your wildest fantasy, you are in hell. And you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil.
Dwight: Yeah, but I haven’t told you my salary yet.
Jim: Go.
Dwight: $80,000 a year.